superangrymonkey

Douchebags

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A moment of your moment please.

Well the barrage of “When are you coming back to youtube?” questions has started again. I don’t really have much to say on that subject other than “shortly.” Like there isn’t really a date, time, or concrete anything in mind for when the new show is going to be but I am going to answer some of the most frequently asked questions.

What is the new show going to be about?

Everything is going to be bigger. Bigger, louder, more in your face, funnier, sketchier, and a lot of other -ers that I can’t think of off the top of my head. I have had a lot of time to sit and think of new bits while I was gone and I am planning on unleashing a veritable shitstorm upon my return.

Will the live show on blogTV return?

Yes. Saturdays at Midnight when the show is back on. I’ll let you all know.

Why did you take your suspension laying down?

Because in truth, I fucked up and was really looking for a chance to start over. At first I was pissed off about the whole thing but then I realized that no matter what I thought about how it happened it was probably a good thing THAT it happened. By “fucked up” I mean that I hated a lot of my older videos and I wanted to take the show in this bigger, louder, and funnier direction. It just seemed like some of my older shit was holding me back from doing that. Does that make me happy that it could happen? No. It’s fucked up the way youtube is boning people and putting so much power into the hands of pussies. I should have kept my replies to assholes on a channel other than my main but hindsight is 20/20.

We wanted to fight to get your old channel back.

That isn’t a question.

Oh… uhhhh…. Should we fight to get your old channel back?

If you want to. I doubt it’ll get anywhere. Youtube doesn’t seem to care about the users anymore.

Will you still debate people?

Not on my main channel anymore. I’m going to make a different channel for replies.

What have you been doing?

Writing a novel.

Really?

Yes.

You keep talking about direction what if we liked the old direction?

What direction?

So are you pushing to become one of the new youtube greats?

Fuck no, the show was always supposed to support the website. A better show means more of everything else.

Who’s your deity?

You are Frank, only you, you my big deity!

What about the sock troll?

He’ll be on the new show.

Do you like MCR?

How the hell did YOU get here?

Schedule plox?

When the show starts again it will be up everyday at about 6:00 pm on Mondays through Thursdays. The live show will be on Saturdays. There will be a sort of sketch comedy element involved as the show is going to be less about me screaming and more an exploration of the overall mistake that is my brain. It will be more like the way I see the world and the humor I see in the everyday shit that most people ignore or don’t want to admit.

Terrible Tuesday?

If you insist…

Seasons? WTF??

It’s hard to think of ideas everyday. I know why TV does it that way now. So the show will air in six week stints and have three weeks off at the end of the six weeks.

The live show?

Will still be on… even when youtube is not

We miss you Baskin.

d-awwwww… >.<

When will you be back again?

Soon baby, daddy has work to do.

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I got invited to go to an SCA event once. Now for those of you who have proper functioning social skills the SCA stands for the Society for Creative Anachronism. Now this archaic name not withstanding what this actually amounts to is that there are people who think its the fucking Renaissance festival all year.

They spend a lot of money on medieval style clothes and armor, and weapons and go to events with other like-minded fuck tards where they get shitty drunk nail ugly and easy girls and basically try to pretend that doing this as a hobby is somewhat cool. Did I mention that they also recreate medieval style combat? Yeah these morons think it is awesome to spend a coupe of hundred dollars on medieval style armor and sticks and beat the living hell out of each other.

They claim that it is a legitimate martial art, sword and shield fighting but I fail to see how it applies to the world we are in now seeing as we invented guns and they totally fucking trumped plate mail. The reason that I got invited to this thing was that a woman who was very nice to me wanted me to spy on a guy who had fucked her a couple of times and did a very god job of making me feel like I owed her. I agreed but I did say that if they made me wear pantaloons I was gonna have to go home. I didn’t have a choice and I had to wear pantaloons anyway.

After a six hour drive from Oklahoma to the middle of toothless country Texas, yeah I was still in the Army at the time we got to where they were holding this impromptu event. It wasn’t an official SCA event but they still charged money to get in. Funny how that works out right? The next thing we did was set up the tend and a woman let me borrow a costume.

I had no choice I was forced to pay money to get to go sit in a field, living in a tent in medieval clothing. The guy, we’ll call him Mike, who the woman convinced to go along with me and help me spy on this other guy thought that this place was the absolute coolest thing that ever happened ever and I heartily disagreed. There was one girl who was moderately cute there and not married to I did my absolute best to make the absolute best of a bad situation by trying to get my dick wet with her. I failed miserably because even though she was in a fucking girdle her tits were strictly off limits to someone who wasn’t going to court her like it was 1,099

Sorry, not I. I did win a prize, well two of them actually one for telling a good story which I have always been good at and one for being a guest. I didn’t score with the hot girl but I did get a hand job from a very ugly girl in the woods which I guess is better than nothing. After we got back to Oklahoma the guy I went with, Mike said that we should buy a couple of suits of armor and really get into it, go to the big events at the Kingdoms and shit… yeah they have kingdoms. I politely declined… well maybe not so politely but still. The SCA is bullshit

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TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES
ANOTHER WAY OF SAYING
THE SHOW IS SLEEPING

I know full well how many of you out there miss my fine mug screaming in your face at irregular and oftentimes annoyingly long intervals and I’m sure you are think that this is what’s going on now. I’m going to be the one to let you know, at the behest of my wife, that this couldn’t be further from the truth. It seems the other day that my wife’s computer, which is the one that I record the show on these days, decided to take a shit on us and enter the realm of pc’s long gone and good riddance. In response to this I cannot use my own computer to record the show because Ubuntu, the operating system that I use on MY computer will not support the camera that I have. Contrary to popular belief I do not like you all enough to go try to find a webcam that works.

My wife’s job requires that she have a computer of some sort so i have allowed her to borrow mine until such a time as her old one can be replaced with another windows-based system, she is not at all interested in using Ubuntu which is great for all of you because that means that there definitely will be more show for all of you. Now, because my wife felt badly that she invaded my space and stuff she bought me a little laptop computer that i can get some of my own shit done and it is pretty fucking awesome. Here’s the thing. The laptop comes equipped with a little on board camera that the operating system that this thing uses (a version of KDE Linux) doesn’t appear to support.

Here’s where I ask you my dear friends, if any of you know how to configure the on board camera to an eee-pc, there will be show again. if not, then I’ll have to wait until the computer is replaced before the youtube hijinks can continue. It sucks, but alas, technical difficulties make the heart grow fonder.

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There are a hell of a lot of people who call me an asshole. This is for you guys

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